But He was wounded for our transgressions,
He was bruised for our iniquities;
The chastisement for our peace was upon Him,
And by His stripes we are healed.
I wrote a blog about being prepared…and finding out about my husband having cancer was hard to prepare for!
finding out that the special, state of the art, 98% successful procedure didn’t work, was hard to prepare for.
finding out the second one – shown by the PSA rising again – was unsuccessful…that was hard to prepare for!
going through the scans to find out where the cancer was hiding…
- MRI – nothing in the prostate (except some prostate …about 1/2 the size of normal) – that was not something that we had prepared for.
- first, why was there prostate tissue? it was all supposed to have been burned away, as we understood it.
- second, why is there no cancer there, and the rising PSA indicated cancer…somewhere.
We weren’t prepared well for this.
- CT scan – Bone scan – NOTHING!!!!!
WE WERE NOT PREPARED FOR THIS!!!!
Did I pray for Jim’s healing?
Were other’s praying for Jim’s healing?
Did it come the way we thought?
What do you do when God answers your prayer – and you weren’t ready for the answer?
I was not prepared!
I had geared up for a battle.
I had planned my long walk in the dark place – believing against all the odds….
I WAS NOT PREPARED TO SEE A MIRACLE!
I thought I was walking in faith…looking forward to God’s hand moving….
and I was looking forward…preparing for a future fight…and I almost missed God’s miracle in the NOW!!!
Heb 11:1 – Faith is the substance of things hoped for…the evidence of things unseen….IN THE FUTURE… this is the instructions for waiting for God to arrive…Right???
gird up your loins…
be ready to run with the horses…
Elijah – was looking FORWARD to the rain…before he saw ANY CLOUD in the sky!
AND GOD CAME INTO OUR LIVES…
GOD TOUCHED JIM’S BODY
AND GOD HAS DESTROYED THE CANCER!!!
Does the enemy still rule over this earth? yes.
Does death still roam this earth? yes.
BUT GOD RULES OVER ALL! and says – death, where is your sting! Grave where is your victory? 1 Corinthians 15:55
Honest transparency –
I was working on the faith – for the future…for the healing I couldn’t see.
I’m struggling with the manifestation – the reality – that they found NO CANCER anywhere in Jim’s body!
Why is that?
Faith is the substance of things HOPED FOR..
the evidence of things NOT SEEN!.Heb 11:1
24For in this hope we were saved; but hope that is seen is no hope at all. Who hopes for what he can already see? 25But if we hope for what we do not yet see, we wait for it patiently. 26In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know how we ought to pray, but the Spirit Himself intercedes for us with groans too deep for words…Romans 8:24-26
I was prepared to WAIT…
I’m used to waiting….
I’m prepared to wait…and wait…and wait…
God’s going to heal me…I believe it….
God’s going to deliver me…I believe it….
God’s going to ….GOING TO!
17For our light and temporary affliction is producing for us an eternal glory that far outweighs our troubles. 18So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal. 2 Corinthians 4:18
For we walk by faith, not by sight. 2 Corinthians 5:7
Yes…I was believing in what I could not see….
and preparing for Jim’s potential death.
So was he.
So were the doctors.
Especially the one that did the treatments…
“I’m sorry man…I’m so sorry…It’s moved out of the confinement…there’s nothing I can do for you”
We were preparing to NOT see a miracle of healing….
We were preparing to see God give us grace to walk through the fire.
There are so many scriptures I could list…of how we were preparing…to accept the NO answer…even not now, which is what it had been, twice.
WE ALMOST MISSED THE ANSWER!!!
Now…I am going to be working on believing that Jim IS HEALED…and that GOD has glorified Himself in Jim’s body!
What about my body?
Well, I was awakened by extreme pain in my lower legs tonight.
I cried out, and battled with the enemy – reminding him that I had asked the Lord for deliverance from this pain.
The Lord met me, and instructed me to go – drink some water – and write this blog.
What level is the pain in my legs now?
0-1 – but more like .5…seriously…0
I’m again, having trouble believing what I AM SEEING IN MY OWN BODY!
I HAVE LIVED SO MANY YEARS WITH PAIN…from the past things done to me, and from the things I have done that did not help those issues be released.’
I have not followed food protocol
I have not followed drink protocol
I have not followed exercise moderation (it’s either a triathlon, or sit in a chair with my foot in a boot)
I have not followed the purposes for which I am called.
I have not fought the fight – I have not stood against the enemy….I was preparing to wait.
I was not standing fast in the liberty wherein Christ has set me FREE!
I was not resisting the enemy so that he would flee!
I WAS ABDICATING MY POSITION AS A CHILD OF GOD!
This morning – while attending church with our daughter, Faith…
the church sang this song:
And the Holy Spirit fell upon the congregation, and the pastor, and He spoke things into my heart about knowing that God will move the mountain…he’s done it before, he’ll do it again…he has not failed me….the song says “yet” – by the forth or fifth time of the chorus…I was dropping the yet.
God has not failed me.
I’ve seen him move mountains.
I’ve seen him raise from the dead.
I’ve seen him heal broken bones.
I’ve seen him restore marriages.
I’ve seen him deliver from demons.
God had not failed me!
Not ever, Not before, not future, and NOT NOW!!!
And I am so glad that God loves me right where I am.
I am so glad that God answers my prayers, even when I’m not ready to see them!
I am confessing my doubts – and my anxieties – and declaring that Jesus is MY LORD, and I say YES to the call to follow (First Baptist Orlando had a great message this morning as well. when it’s posted, I’ll attach it here.)
As Beth Moore taught us:
1. God is who he says He is
2. God can do what He says He can do.
3. I am who God says I am.
4. I can do all things through Christ.
5. God’s word is alive and active in me!
I am believing God.
Believing God bookmarks
From The Beth Moore Believing God study.
I was preparing to see God move.
I WANT TO BE EXPECTANT!
How about you?
Thanks for joining me in this journey,
In His hands and under His wings,
Ps 63:7 Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings.
“The Lord does not give me rules, but He makes His standard very clear.
If my relationship to Him is that of love, I will do what He says without hesitation.
If I hesitate, it is because I love someone I have placed in competition with Him, namely, myself.” – from My Utmost for His highest
I want to thank
for the ability to search the Bible online.
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