Tag Archives: Jesus Loves Me

Believe

Even If – I will still believe!

Believe

Some have asked me how I’ve gotten through the last five years… mental health mess, cancer attacking Jim Wildman, cancer attacking me, shattered shoulder in Mexico with two serious surgeries, fibro, cfs/me, nerve issues, vertigo, eye issues, and now, symptoms of this virus.

Some have said…

Forget God helping you through it come of why didn’t God protect you from it? (Does that sound like Job’s wife? Job 2:9)

I posted it is well with my soul on Facebook a little bit ago. Look up that story on Youtube.

Through so many things, I’ve learned to praise him in the storm.

When we love someone, do we only love them when they are fulfilling all our wishes and dreams and desires? Of course not. Or isn’t love.

Amazing Love

But when we believe that there is a supreme being that watches over us, Who walks with us, even through The Valley of the shadow of death… and I’ve been in that Valley several times… that love is wrapped up with Adoration, Worship, Devotion, and mostly Trust.

The sheep don’t understand why the shepherd might move them from what looks like something beautiful to something ugly.

But the shepherd knows.

The cows don’t understand why the cowboy runs around them scaring them into a specific direction.

But the cowboy knows.

The patient doesn’t understand why she has to walk her fingers up the wall and step away and hold her arm in the air and then slowly let it down with some pretty definite pain.

But the physical therapist knows.

The dog doesn’t understand why his trainer continues to have her sit and stand and and down when all she wants to do is play.

But the trainer knows.

I don’t understand what the doctors did when they opened me up and traumatized bones and ligaments and muscles.

But the doctor knows.

I don’t understand in the middle of my storms what the purpose is,

but I know who rides on the storms And He knows.

And because of that, it is well with my soul. My God is so big, so great, and so awesome, that I can trust him with my “ifs”.

Hi!
My hope in the midst of despair and my joy in the face of depression is because of my relationship with Jesus Christ. If you do not have one, or are not sure you will join him in heaven, please check out these links.

Thanks for joining me in this journey,
In His hands and under His wings,

~Christi
Ps 63:7 Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings.

“The Lord does not give me rules, but He makes His standard very clear.
If my relationship to Him is that of love, I will do what He says without hesitation.
If I hesitate, it is because I love someone I have placed in competition with Him, namely, myself.” –
from My Utmost for His highest

Copyrights and Legal-eze
There are many organizations that support children and families. Here are ones that we are blessed to be a part of. Please consider sponsoring a child – the life you change could be your own.

EKG heartbeat, straight line, cross, heart alive

2019 Lent Day 20 – the Way, the Truth, THE LIFE

Lent Devotions
Lent Week Three – for Catch up.
Lent Week Four started March 5, 2018 and March 23, 2019

Lent Day Twenty
The Way, the Truth & The Life John 14:5-14

Music
You are Life by Hillsong

Devotion
The WAY, the TRUTH, and the LIFE.
Tuesday, we looked at THE WAY.
Wednesday, we looked at the TRUTH.
Today, we will look at THE LIFE.

Pastor John Piper has a great sermon about the Life God gives us.

Here is his Easter sermon from 1984, talking about God giving you life in your mortal bodies.

EKG Cross heart beat heartI want to look at Jesus IS THE LIFE.

From BlueLetter Bible, the Outline of the Biblical Usage of this word is this:

  • life
  • the state of one who is possessed of vitality or is animate
  • every living soul
  • life
  • of the absolute fulness of life, both essential and ethical, which belongs to God, and through him both to the hypostatic “logos” and to Christ in whom the “logos” put on human nature
  • life real and genuine, a life active and vigorous, devoted to God, blessed, in the portion even in this world of those who put their trust in Christ, but after the resurrection to be consummated by new accessions (among them a more perfect body), and to last for ever.

Websters has these choices:
1a : the quality that distinguishes a vital and functional being from a dead body
c : an organismic state characterized by capacity for metabolism (see METABOLISM sense 1), growth, reaction to stimuli, and reproduction
4 : spiritual existence transcending (see TRANSCEND sense 1c) physical death
5a : the period from birth to death

There are 20 entries!
My summary:
Life is being able for growth, reaction to stimuli and reproduction in a human.
Life is a spiritual transcendance of a human and the very nature of God
This is my favorite definition:

life real and genuine, a life active and vigorous, devoted to God, blessed, in the portion even in this world of those who put their trust in Christ, but after the resurrection to be consummated by new accessions (among them a more perfect body), and to last for ever.

To discuss how Jesus is LIFE, we need to find out where death came from!
Genesis 1

Genesis 1 King James Version (KJV)
1 In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth.
2 And the earth was without form, and void; and darkness was upon the face of the deep. And the Spirit of God moved upon the face of the waters.
3 And God said, Let there be light: and there was light.

Before God created man, He created, period!

  1. Light
  2. Firmament of Heaven divided from Earth
  3. Dry land separated from water, plants – first evidence of life
  4. Sun, Moon, Stars – Day and Night
  5. Water Creatures
  6. Land creatures and Man

There are various creation theologies.
Back to John Pipers ministry, they provide Creation Theology in 12 points.
Here is a very deep explanation of Genesis 1:1 and 1:2 from Answers in Genesis.
The theological term is creatio ex nihilo, the Latin for “from nothing”.

This is the theological position I believe.
and here’s a few verses to back my belief up, though others will have verses that back up their theology.

Hebrews 11:3 King James Version (KJV)
3 Through faith we understand that the worlds were framed by the word of God, so that things which are seen were not made of things which do appear.

John 1:3 King James Version (KJV)
3 All things were made by him; and without him was not any thing made that was made.

Why do I believe this?
1. In the Beginning – God.
Out of His creative character, and because only HE can create matter(First Law of Thermodynamics and the Law of Conservation of Mass Energy) God Created.
Nothing was made without him is the rephrasing of without him was not anything made that was made.
2. God is eternal, therefore, within Him resides ETERNAL life. Ps 90 All About God – Eternal God.
3.All beings with a spirit are Eternal or Immortal, but only God is without beginning or end. Daniel 12:2-3, All About God’s writing about is the Human soul mortal or immortal?
4. The order of Creation sets up the stage for LIFE on earth!
5. Man was not alive until God breathed life into him. Genesis 2:7
6. In the midst of the Garden there was a tree of life.
7. In the midst of the Garden there was the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. Genesis 2:9

What happened? SIN
I’ve written about Adam and Eve on many instances, but my favorite is An Inconvenient Truth.

Short story:
Eve listened to the Serpent
Adam listened to Eve
God found out.
animal had to be killed to pay the price so they would not have to die.
At that point, death entered the world.
Cain killing Abel was the first murder.
and it goes down hill from there…
UNTIL

Jesus is born.
Eve had been given a promise.

Genesis 2:15
15 And I will put enmity between thee and the woman, and between thy seed and her seed; it shall bruise thy head, and thou shalt bruise his heel.

They did not have to suffer physical death instantly as the judgement of their disobedience demanded, but something had to. A sacrificial animal. The precursor to Jesus Christ, the sacrificial Lamb.
Here’s where you can learn more:

I am that I am – a statement of Life, complete existence in Himself – THIS IS THE FIRST NAME GOD GAVE HIMSELF.

Only HE who HAS can give to he who has not.

John 10:10 King James Version (KJV)
10 The thief cometh not, but for to steal, and to kill, and to destroy: I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly.

Back to Genesis –

Genesis 3
22 And the Lord God said, Behold, the man is become as one of us, to know good and evil: and now, lest he put forth his hand, and take also of the tree of life, and eat, and live for ever:

23 Therefore the Lord God sent him forth from the garden of Eden, to till the ground from whence he was taken.

24 So he drove out the man; and he placed at the east of the garden of Eden Cherubims, and a flaming sword which turned every way, to keep the way of the tree of life.

Because of the disobedience, they were driven out of Paradise.
They were forbidden to eat of the Tree of Life!
We are in the midst of a study called Freedom created by The Church of the Highlands. I highly recommend it, to get a new and fresh look at the Trees from the Garden.

To eat of the Tree of Life would have meant that they would forever live in their sin. God prevented that.

green tree with live brancesJesus is the Rod of Jesse – like a tree. Is 11:1-2
Jesus is the Branch – like a tree. Zech 6:12
Jesus is the Vine – a plant. John 15
Hebrews 11:17-24 talks about being grafted into the tree of the family of God.
Romans 6 talks about being dead to sin and alive to Christ.

When we are saved, the old man dies – the death payment for our sins, and the new man comes alive – the Life bestowed upon us for being IN CHRIST!

Acts 17:28 New International Version (NIV)
28 ‘For in him we live and move and have our being.’[a] As some of your own poets have said, ‘We are his offspring.’[b]

The interesting thing here is that Paul is talking to the people of Athens – and is quoting their own poet, who was speaking of THE UNKNOWN GOD. They knew there was some power that was in everything – and Paul declares Him as the God of Creation, who sent His son so that we could KNOW HIM!Jesus is my life with tree

Jesus broke down the walls that separated us from the Tree of Life!
In Jesus, WE HAVE LIFE!

That is worth celebrating!

Worship
I am the Vine by John Michael Talbot
Now my Lifesong Sings by Casting Crowns
LifeSong by Casting Crowns
In Him We Live and Move and Have our Being

~~~~~~~

Hi!
My hope in the midst of despair and my joy in the face of depression is because of my relationship with Jesus Christ. If you do not have one, or are not sure you will join him in heaven, please check out these links:

Thanks for joining me in this journey,
In His hands and under His wings,

~Christi
Ps 63:7 Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings.

Older woman with shades of coral in jewelry and sweater, glasses, silver and brown hair.

M. Christine Wildman

“The Lord does not give me rules, but He makes His standard very clear.
If my relationship to Him is that of love, I will do what He says without hesitation.
If I hesitate, it is because I love someone I have placed in competition with Him, namely, myself.” –
from My Utmost for His highest

Copyrights and Legal-eze
There are many organizations that support children and families. Here are ones that we are blessed to be a part of. Please consider sponsoring a child – the life you change could be your own.

2019 Lent Day 19 – The Way, THE TRUTH, The Life

Lent Devotions
Lent Week Three – for Catch up.
Lent Week Four started March 5, 2018

Lent Day Nineteen
The Way, the Truth & The Life John 14:5-14

Music
Song of Truth by Mark Shelton & Jonathan Malone

Scripture
John 14:6 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
6 Jesus told him, “I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me.”

Devotion
The WAY, the TRUTH, and the LIFE.
Yesterday, we looked at THE WAY.
Today, we’re going to look at the TRUTH.

Jesus says he is the TRUTH, but what is truth?

From Websters Dictionary
Definition of truth (Entry 1 of 2)
1a(1) : the body of real things, events, and facts : ACTUALITY
(2) : the state of being the case : FACT
(3) often capitalized : a transcendent fundamental or spiritual reality
b : a judgment, proposition, or idea that is true or accepted as true
truths of thermodynamics
c : the body of true statements and propositions
2a: the property (as of a statement) of being in accord with fact or reality
b chiefly British : TRUE sense 2
c : fidelity to an original or to a standard
3a : sincerity in action, character, and utterance
b archaic : FIDELITY, CONSTANCY

Blueletter Bible explains the Biblical usage in this outline
objectively

  • what is true in any matter under consideration
  • truly, in truth, according to truth
  • of a truth, in reality, in fact, certainly
  • what is true in things appertaining to God and the duties of man, moral and religious truth
  • in the greatest latitude
  • the true notions of God which are open to human reason without his supernatural intervention
  • the truth as taught in the Christian religion, respecting God and the execution of his purposes through Christ, and respecting the duties of man, opposing alike to the superstitions of the Gentiles and the inventions of the Jews, and the corrupt opinions and precepts of false teachers even among Christians

Strongs G225 simplified says this:
I. objectively;
1. universally, what is true in any matter under consideration (opposed to what is feigned, fictitious, false):

John 1:14 & 17 says

John 1:14-17 King James Version (KJV)
14 And the Word was made flesh, and dwelt among us, (and we beheld his glory, the glory as of the only begotten of the Father,) full of grace and truth.
15 John bare witness of him, and cried, saying, This was he of whom I spake, He that cometh after me is preferred before me: for he was before me.
16 And of his fulness have all we received, and grace for grace.
17 For the law was given by Moses, but grace and truth came by Jesus Christ.

      • Jesus says He is the Truth.
      • John describes Him as bringing Truth.
      • The Religious leaders told him that he taught the truth in Mt 22:16, Mk 12:14, and Luke 20:21.
      • Jesus tells us that

        John 8:32 King James Version (KJV)
        32 And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.

      • Jesus says we should do truth in John 3:21
      • Jesus says we need to worship God in Spirit and in Truth in John 4:24
      • Jesus prays about us being sanctified by the truth in John 17:17

        John 17:17 King James Version (KJV)
        17 Sanctify them through thy truth: thy word is truth.

      • Jesus says to the Father – THY word is TRUTH!

Is Truth a Who? What? How?

Thing or Action – Our Salvation

Ephesians 1:13 King James Version (KJV)
13 In whom ye also trusted, after that ye heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation: in whom also after that ye believed, ye were sealed with that holy Spirit of promise,

Action – Our responsibility to obey  – Galatians 3:1 and 5:7

Thing – Part of our Armor! Loins girt about with Truth!  Eph 6:14

Person or Character – God is not a liar – therefore God is true:  – Titus 1:2, Heb 6:18 and

Numbers 23:19 King James Version (KJV)
19 God is not a man, that he should lie; neither the son of man, that he should repent: hath he said, and shall he not do it? or hath he spoken, and shall he not make it good?

In fact, Hebrews 6:18 says that it is an immutable thing…God cannot lie! Part of His Character!

Person –  Jesus promises a comforter…the Spirit of Truth!  John 15:26,

John 14:17 King James Version (KJV)
17 Even the Spirit of truth; whom the world cannot receive, because it seeth him not, neither knoweth him: but ye know him; for he dwelleth with you, and shall be in you.

Person – The Spirit of Truth is our Teacher.

John 16:13 King James Version (KJV)
13 Howbeit when he, the Spirit of truth, is come, he will guide you into all truth: for he shall not speak of himself; but whatsoever he shall hear, that shall he speak: and he will shew you things to come.

Who is this comforter? The Holy Spirit, the third person in the God head! For more info on the Tri-unity of God, Lent Day 7

  • Jesus is the Truth
  • God’s Word is True.
  • Jesus is the Word.
  • We are sanctified by the Word.
  • Jesus is God
  • God cannot lie.
  • The Holy Spirit is God.
  • The Holy Spirit is Truth
  • The Holy Spirit is the comforter that Jesus sends back to teach us all things of TRUTH!

What are the “doing” parts?
Part One – teachings – The Holy Spirit is guiding us into all truth…because Jesus promised that

John 8:32 King James Version (KJV)
32 And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.

Part Two – actions

So that we can gird our loins with TRUTH.
So that we will not be deceived by the enemy.
So that we will be set free from the lies that surround us.

How can this be a concept, a person, thing and an action at the same time?

  • By Faith, we Believe on the Lord Jesus Christ – TRUTH as a person.
  • God’s heart is that all will come to the knowledge of truth – 1 Tim 2:4 – TRUTH as a concept to be taught.
  • We are told to obey the truth in Galatians – TRUTH as a concept and action.
  • We are told to gird our loins with TRUTH – TRUTH as a noun

God is only known in spirit and in truth. He is OTHER. This is a whole study unto itself. The thing is, that we believe it because God said it, and we trust His Words. It is because HE is. It is by faith, through grace.

Ephesians 2:8 King James Version (KJV)
8 For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God:

Romans 10:9 King James Version (KJV)
9 That if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved.

The opposite of truth is deceit.
I don’t want to list these verses, and fill up this blog, but, for further study, here is a list of scriptures about deceit from Bible Study Tools.

Colossians 3:9-10 King James Version (KJV)
9 Lie not one to another, seeing that ye have put off the old man with his deeds;
10 And have put on the new man, which is renewed in knowledge after the image of him that created him:

Deceit is part of the old man – the man without the resurrection power of Jesus Christ in their lives.
Remember, we are known by our fruit!

Jesus is the TRUTH – and by allowing him to enter into our lives, and make us new, set free from the old man, we are back in relationship with the God who Is TRUE, and we can be filled with the Holy Spirit of Truth, who will guide us into all truth!

In that light, we can
Psalm 37:3-6 King James Version (KJV)
3 Trust in the Lord, and do good; so shalt thou dwell in the land, and verily thou shalt be fed.

4 Delight thyself also in the Lord: and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart.

5 Commit thy way unto the Lord; trust also in him; and he shall bring it to pass.

6 And he shall bring forth thy righteousness as the light, and thy judgment as the noonday.

Truth is God, Godly and Godliness.
For more – Itty Bitty Bible Study Titus Ambassadors

Worship
Voice of Truth
Stronger by Hillsong

Hi!
My hope in the midst of despair and my joy in the face of depression is because of my relationship with Jesus Christ. If you do not have one, or are not sure you will join him in heaven, please check out these links.

Thanks for joining me in this journey,
In His hands and under His wings,

~Christi
Ps 63:7 Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings.

“The Lord does not give me rules, but He makes His standard very clear.
If my relationship to Him is that of love, I will do what He says without hesitation.
If I hesitate, it is because I love someone I have placed in competition with Him, namely, myself.” –
from My Utmost for His highest

Copyrights and Legal-eze
There are many organizations that support children and families. Here are ones that we are blessed to be a part of. Please consider sponsoring a child – the life you change could be your own.

2018 Lent Day 18 – 3/6 – THE WAY, The Truth & The Life

Lent Devotions
Lent Week Three – for Catch up.
Lent Week Four started March 5, 2018

Lent Day Eighteen
The Way, the Truth & The Life John 14:5-14

Music
Jesus is the Way, the Truth and the Life

Scripture
John 14:6 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
6 Jesus told him, “I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me.”

Devotion
The WAY, the TRUTH, and the LIFE.

THE WAY
It really starts with verse 1:

John 14:1-14 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
The Way to the Father
14 “Your heart must not be troubled. Believe in God; believe also in Me.
2 In My Father’s house are many dwelling places; if not, I would have told you. I am going away to prepare a place for you.
3 If I go away and prepare a place for you, I will come back and receive you to Myself, so that where I am you may be also.
4 You know the way to where I am going.”
5 “Lord,” Thomas said, “we don’t know where You’re going. How can we know the way?”
6 Jesus told him, “I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me.

Jesus was trying to comfort them….”let not your heart be troubled”.

HOW?
“Believe in God, believe also in me.”
In Lent Day Eight, we discussed how he placed the choice before them…that HE cried out, and almost begs them to choose Him!
It is the basis of our salvation – Acts 16:31 – to believe on the Lord Jesus Christ and you shall be saved!

He tells them that he is going to prepare a place for them…as I wrote about in Day Seventeen, Many Mansions.

Dear Thomas, so honest and transparent…”we don’t know where you’re going…how can we know the way!”

In lent Day Seven, we discussed the Tri-unity of God – His unity in plurality. Here, Jesus reminds them that He and the Father are one, as he stated in John 10:30.

This is NEW to the Jewish religion – that God is One in Three.
Here is a quote from Day Seven:

  • In the beginning God spoke let there be light.(Genesis 1) God’s voice is the source of creation – The Father
  • In the Beginning – the spirit hovered over the face of the waters – The Holy Spirit.
  • In the Beginning was the word and the Word was God and the Word was with God – Jesus (John 1) All things were created through Him,
    and apart from Him not one thing was created
    that has been created.

We know that God’s voice spoke words. We know that the word of God is Jesus Christ. We know that Jesus Christ was part of the creative power in the beginning. We know that God moves upon water as The Holy Spirit, in the beginning. We have a Triune God to manifest himself in Father, Son and Holy Ghost. Three distinct personalities in one complete person. Several times, when God speaks, the fullness of the Godhead is displayed.

~~~~Theology of the Trinity on Wikipedia, Answers in Genesis, Desiring God, and possibly my favorite – The Gospel Coalition~~~~

The WAY is to believe in the fullness of the Godhead! And, Jesus prepared the way for us, through His death, burial and resurrection! If you have questions on that concept, there are links in my signature!

Worship & Praise
What a Savior – Laura Story
One Way – Hillsong

The next few days will be about the Truth and the Life!

Hi!
My hope in the midst of despair and my joy in the face of depression is because of my relationship with Jesus Christ. If you do not have one, or are not sure you will join him in heaven, please check out these links.

Thanks for joining me in this journey,
In His hands and under His wings,

~Christi
Ps 63:7 Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings.

“The Lord does not give me rules, but He makes His standard very clear.
If my relationship to Him is that of love, I will do what He says without hesitation.
If I hesitate, it is because I love someone I have placed in competition with Him, namely, myself.” –
from My Utmost for His highest

Copyrights and Legal-eze
There are many organizations that support children and families. Here are ones that we are blessed to be a part of. Please consider sponsoring a child – the life you change could be your own.

My One Word 2019 – Guard Your Heart Pr 4:23 – 2/25/2019

Proverbs 4:23 English Standard Version (ESV)
23 Keep your heart with all vigilance,
for from it flow the springs of life.

My notes on the bitterness post:

Guard your heart
Bitterness
On forgiveness

How did i learn i had bitterness?
By my words
Out of the abundance of my heart, my mouth spoke

I am an abuser survivor
Forgave
Healed
Didn’t wait for the abuser to apologize
It only takes one to forgive.

I am a peaceful conflict resolution teacher
I know the steps
It takes two, to do a resolution.

I’m a human
I’ve been wounded
I thought I’d forgiven
I have bitterness

Why is it so difficult forget sometimes? Is it because someone has hurt you over and over and over? And they have the potential to continue doing so? And you’re sure you fill the 70 × 7 forgiveness requirement?

Hebrews 12:15 King James Version (KJV)
15 Looking diligently lest any man fail of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up trouble you, and thereby many be defiled;

I just completed IBBS Titus 1:10-16, and in Titus, Paul warns about those who are defiled.

Titus 1:15 King James Version (KJV)
15 Unto the pure all things are pure: but unto them that are defiled and unbelieving is nothing pure; but even their mind and conscience is defiled.

I discussed how when someone chooses to go the way of the wide path, and not the straight and narrow, eventually, God gives them over to their own lusts. God gives them, or allows them, what they want. Romans 1:18-32

All I wanted to do was to discuss the concept of holding unforgiveness in your heart would cause you problems.  Well, me, specifically. These posts are all written to me, I just share them with whomever is interested! HA! Such a simple task, I thought! Therefore, as God would have it, I’ve been enlightened about how much bitterness I hold in my heart!

I’ve written a few times about bitterness!

Forgiveness:

About anger:

Coming up soon, from the date of this writing, is the Resurrection Season. I wrote a series for Lent last year, and the First Sunday of Lent deals with Forgiveness!

There is a website that I refer to often, GotQuestions.org.
Here’s their write up on What is Forgiveness. The article talks about the two aspects of forgiveness – the part that is key to our salvation, or, OUR forgiveness by GOD, and the part that we are to implement, or, OUR forgiveness of OTHERS.

Another resource is from Desiring God, and here is a list of their various posts on Forgiveness…including several by John Piper. Here’s one that fits this topic wonderfully – How to Battle Bitterness!

In that sermon, John Piper brings up this verse:

Romans 12:19 King James Version (KJV)
19 Dearly beloved, avenge not yourselves, but rather give place unto wrath: for it is written, Vengeance is mine; I will repay, saith the Lord.

Isn’t that why we hold onto the anger, the rage, the hurt and such? We want vengeance?

“Revenge – it’s a dish best served cold.”

I have no idea where that came from. Wikipedia says this:

The popular expression “revenge is a dish best served cold” suggests that revenge is more satisfying if enacted when unexpected or long feared, inverting traditional civilized revulsion toward “cold-blooded” violence.[12]

The idea’s origin is obscure. The French diplomat Charles Maurice de Talleyrand-Périgord (1754–1838) has been credited with the saying, “La vengeance est un met que l’on doit manger froid” [“Revenge is a dish that must be eaten cold”], albeit without supporting detail.[13] It has been in the English language at least since the 1846 translation of the 1845 French novel Mathilde by Joseph Marie Eugène Sue: “la vengeance se mange très bien froide”,[14] there italicized as if quoting a proverbial saying, and translated “revenge is very good eaten cold”.[15] It has been wrongly credited[16] to the novel Les Liaisons Dangereuses (1782).

Its path to modern popularity may begin with the 1949 film Kind Hearts and Coronets which had revenge is a dish which people of taste prefer to eat cold. The familiar wording appears in the film Death Rides a Horse (1967), in the novel The Godfather by Mario Puzo (1969), as if from an “old Klingon proverb” in the film Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan (1982). The title sequence of the Quentin Tarantino film Kill Bill: Volume 1 (2003) referred to this last movie by again citing it as a Klingon proverb. After that it appeared in the 2004 version of Man on Fire.

The phrase has also been credited to the Pashtuns of Afghanistan.[17]

Another proverb states, “Before you embark on a journey of revenge, dig two graves”. Another version (Chinese: 子不复仇非子也) proposes that a son who does not take revenge for his parents is not a son.[citation needed]

That’s the way of the flesh.
Hebrews 12:15 says not to allow a root of bitterness to grow! And, any plant grows from a seed.
Romans 12:19 says to let God take vengeance on our behalf.

When our children were little, they often offended each other. Yes. It’s true.
If they came to me with the concern, I would sit them down, and start a peaceful conflict resolution – let’s talk it out, and come up with a satisfactory solution.
If one lied, they would be disciplined.
If one disobeyed some rule, they would be disciplined.
BUT, if the offended one took matters into their own hand, I would say
“you already handed out the punishment, I cannot punish them anymore. If you want them to have discipline and learn the lesson, you need to let me be the judge, and pronounce the judgement.”

These aren’t quite the same thing, yet I’m pretty sure these verses were those from whom I gleaned this concept.

Proverbs 24:17-18 New International Version (NIV)
Saying 28
17 Do not gloat when your enemy falls;
when they stumble, do not let your heart rejoice,
18 or the Lord will see and disapprove
and turn his wrath away from them.

Proverbs 24:29 King James Version (KJV)
29 Say not, I will do so to him as he hath done to me: I will render to the man according to his work.

And a few others:

Lev 19:18
Deut 32:35

I have written about God being a Vengeful God in IBBS Nahum 1:2b

The thing is, vengeance is a release of the anger and the bitterness, from our physical, emotional and mental perspectives.
Forgiveness is letting go from a SPIRITUAL perspective.

holding onto anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die

I’ve done much study on Forgiveness as an abuse survivor.
It’s not about the other person, though, if they want to sit down and work things out, GREAT!
It’s about MY HEART!!

God says in His Word:

Ephesians 4:26-27 King James Version (KJV)
26 Be ye angry, and sin not: let not the sun go down upon your wrath:
27 Neither give place to the devil.

What happens if we give place to the devil?

Hebrews 12:15 King James Version (KJV)
15 Looking diligently lest any man fail of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up trouble you, and thereby many be defiled;

And yet, Our Heavenly Father knows us so much, that he gave us a promise to help us let go of that anger:

Romans 12:19 King James Version (KJV)
19 Dearly beloved, avenge not yourselves, but rather give place unto wrath: for it is written, Vengeance is mine; I will repay, saith the Lord.

Give room for GOD’s wrath to deal with it!

Did Jesus talk about this? Yes, including instructions!

Matthew 5:21-25 King James Version (KJV)
21 Ye have heard that it was said of them of old time, Thou shalt not kill; and whosoever shall kill shall be in danger of the judgment:
22 But I say unto you, That whosoever is angry with his brother without a cause shall be in danger of the judgment: and whosoever shall say to his brother, Raca, shall be in danger of the council: but whosoever shall say, Thou fool, shall be in danger of hell fire.

Matthew 5 is the beginning of the Sermon on the Mount.
Blessed are the

  • poor in Spirit
  • mourn
  • meek
  • hunger and thirst after righteousness
  • merciful
  • pure in heart
  • peace makers

Do any of those sounds like anger, wrath, or bitterness? Nope, not to me, either.
The fruit of the Spirit are:

  • Love
  • Joy
  • Peace
  • Patience
  • Gentleness
  • Goodness
  • Faith
  • Meekness
  • Self-Control

Anything look like anger, wrath and bitterness there? nope, nada!

1 Corinthians 13, in the chapter describing LOVE says this:

1 Corinthians 13:5 New International Version (NIV)
5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.

Not only does love not get easily angered, IT KEEPS NO RECORD OF WRONGS.
ISN’T THAT BITTERNESS???

Before listing the fruit of the Spirit, Paul lists the fruit of the flesh.

Galatians 5:19-21 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
19 Now the works of the flesh are obvious: sexual immorality, moral impurity, promiscuity,
20 idolatry, sorcery, hatreds, strife, jealousy, outbursts of anger, selfish ambitions, dissensions, factions,
21 envy, drunkenness, carousing, and anything similar. I tell you about these things in advance—as I told you before—that those who practice such things will not inherit the kingdom of God.

Even though we are forgiven for our sins, and yes, we struggle with the flesh in this life, these things are not becoming of an Ambassador of Christ! While I’m studying this, as I said above, I was also studying about what it meant to be an ambassador for and of Christ through Titus 1. IBBS Titus 1:6-9 Ambassadors

See, when someone starts sharing things, things that could be perceived as teachings, they could be perceived as teachers.
I am told, as an old woman to teach the younger women.
TEACH seems to be the key word here.
This is to the older men, but, in my Titus studies, I realize, it isn’t gender specific!

Titus 2:6-8 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
7… Make yourself an example of good works with integrity and dignity in your teaching. 8 Your message is to be sound beyond reproach, so that the opponent will be ashamed, having nothing bad to say about us.

It’s a warning to anyone that potentially teaches.

James 3:1-2 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
3:1 Not many should become teachers, my brothers, knowing that we will receive a stricter judgment,

Of course…we are all called to teach…

Matthew 28:19-20 King James Version (KJV)
19 Go ye therefore, and teach all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost:
20 Teaching them to observe all things whatsoever I have commanded you: and, lo, I am with you always, even unto the end of the world. Amen.

What does this have to do with Bitterness, unforgiveness and anger?
I HAVE NOT HAD SO MUCH TROUBLE IN YEARS WITH ANGER AND BITTERNESS TOWARDS MY FAMILY as I have since I started working on this post!
Was there anything that anyone did horrible to me?
NO!
Was there anything illegal, immoral, or of enduring effect?
NO!
I just didn’t seem to be able to LET GO of the pain!

Testimony…
Yes, I have had pains that come up, and I do have triggers because of those painful memories.
Yes, my family sometimes forgets the (long list, I’m sure) triggers that trigger me.
YES, I get hurt. Mad sometimes. Sometimes, I have to talk to them about it.
The thing is, a long time ago, I decided that I didn’t have the emotional energy, nor the mental capacity to give anger room in me! It’s exhausting!
YET NOW IT’S HAPPENING!

Maybe, just maybe, there was special grace given to me to forgive my abusers, and now, I have to seek out that grace in face of MY NEED for forgiveness.

What do I mean by that?

Matthew 6:14-15 King James Version (KJV)
14 For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you:
15 But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.

There’s a qualification to being forgiven! Jesus said so!
I studied that when I was going through the early therapy for the PTSD, and prayed to forgive my abuser.
Years later, I went through some spiritual techniques that had you go through and forgive all those from your past. This included asking those you could contact for forgiveness where needed.
Here I am, actually writing a piece because of a few things that were bothering me…and I get hit with a month’s worth of lessons on anger, bitterness, releasing the pain, and forgiveness.

I had a diagram that I wanted to create a video of.
I’m going to share that photo here, but because of a new friend, Ebony, I’ve just been made aware of another aspect to forgiveness and bitterness that I need to work on…forgiving myself!

I’ll explain this, and maybe have a video in part two!

 
Hi!
My hope in the midst of despair and my joy in the face of depression is because of my relationship with Jesus Christ. If you do not have one, or are not sure you will join him in heaven, please check out these links.

Thanks for joining me in this journey,
In His hands and under His wings,

~Christi
Ps 63:7 Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings.

“The Lord does not give me rules, but He makes His standard very clear.
If my relationship to Him is that of love, I will do what He says without hesitation.
If I hesitate, it is because I love someone I have placed in competition with Him, namely, myself.” –
from My Utmost for His highest

Copyrights and Legal-eze
There are many organizations that support children and families. Here are ones that we are blessed to be a part of. Please consider sponsoring a child – the life you change could be your own.

2018 Summary – My One Word and other thoughts

Hello 2019!
Good bye 2018.
But first, I tend to look over the past year, and see any mistakes, misunderstandings, mess ups so I can potentially change that for the next year.

One thing I have not normally done is look over the last year for successes! Hmmm, that goes along with my mental illness cognitive distortions…I’ve talked about those in other places. I think that the final days of 2018, I experienced a success. Let me tell you that story!

Last days of 2018 revelation

I had held my husband to a dream I called a vision that I had for us…and I held my children to one when they lived in our house. It was for our joy and the glory of God, so it’s all good, right?

Let me tell you the story.
We had just attended church where the pastor was talking about the mission statement for our church:

  • Loved
  • Life
  • Fulfill your purpose

Pastor talked about how after a very tragic event in he and his wife’s life, they were seeking God about what to do. They realized that they saw others hurting the same way they were, and they could minister to them, and give them hope. Out of that heart was born our church.

Now, this is the key to my purpose and ministry. Out of my wounds, I reach out to other wounded women, and lead them to the healing power and love of Jesus.

After Church, Jim and I went to dinner.
I like to discuss the message after church, it seems to help me settle it down in my heart.

I asked Jim what was his purpose in life.
“To be like Jesus”

Um, that is the general call of God to all those who believe upon Him. That is NOT a specific call.
Here’s what I have seen over the years.

  • He and I have had difficulties learning each other’s love languages.
  • He and I have separated and come back together, not with the heavenly music and angels, with the romantic nuances, but by hard work and determination to stay the course as a married couple(we both agree God called us to marry).
  • He and I have tools that we could share with other couples.
  • We have been told that we have a testimony that will change marriages.
  • We have been told that we are called to take what we’ve learned and share it with others.

I asked Jim what was his purpose in life.
“To Be Like Jesus”

Jim has no desire to be in couples ministry.
Jim has no desire to minister to other couples.
Let me clarify that last one.
Jim has no desire to minister to other couples AS A COUPLE.
In fact, we do not have the same point of view about how our marriage has been saved, nor about the testimony of the years, nor about how or what we’ve done, other than God.

My heart broke…Jim had no calling to minister with me to couples that were hurting.
This explained why he had no desire to give counsel to our children about the pit falls they were walking into in their relationships.
This explains why whenever I talk about marriage ministry I hear crickets.

So, I broke down, and spent a day in bed crying out to God.
What is wrong?
Why can’t he see his call?
“Is it his call?”
But Lord, it’s the focus of all things Bible…take the evil and turn it to good…take the wounded to bring healing…our marriage was broken, is broken, but we have tools that we can share to save other marriages!
“What is your call?”
To glean from my wounds to help the wounded seek Jesus and be healed, loved, and delivered.
And the Lord reminded me of one of my visions.
I was standing before women, with healing flowing from my hands as I spoke.
Jim wasn’t there.
The children weren’t there.
Only me.
THIS WAS MY CALL ALL ALONG!

The Revelation?
HE DID NOT HAVE THIS CALL!
Do I?
Maybe, but not as a couple, if Jim doesn’t have the call!
It kind of takes a couple to be a couple in ministry to couples. I’m only half of the couple!

Another revelation as I looked at OUR calling…
I also felt that the fact that our children and we collectively represented all 7 motivational giftings, and could be an enormous powerhouse for God…we just had to die to self and learn to work together! A ministering family!
I wanted our family to enjoy the joy of being with Jesus that I enjoyed when I did street ministry, beach witnessing, discipleship, working with homeless, and crisis pregnancy and wounded women. I wanted them to be part of the same joy that I was experiencing.

Instead, I was projecting my dream upon them.
Was there anything wrong with my dream?
No. there are plenty of families that have similar ministries to what I dreamed of.
Was there anything wrong with my approach?
Yes – if God didn’t give them a call, then I was pushing them, and that is NOT the way God works.
Can I see their giftings?
Yes.
Can I make them walk in their giftings?
No.
Can I place a call upon their lives because of the one placed upon my life?
Only if I am God…and I am not…and everyone said or shouted “AMEN”

I repeat, I was projecting a form of my ministry calling upon them. It’s NOT MY JOB to tell them what their calling is!
I’M NOT THE HOLY SPIRIT!

Again, let’s all say AMEN! and THANK GOD!

I apologized to Jim, and asked him to give me grace because i do see the greatness in him, and I see the potential for his story to help heal others, and I know that he is doing so, but not with me.

With me.
Hmmm.

Therein lies one of the lies I have embraced, or the fears that I have allowed to lead me.
I don’t want to be alone.
I will be all alone.
I will fail all alone.
I am alone.

One of the mental illnesses causes me fear when I meet new people that they will not like me or that they will hurt me.
It’s something that by God’s grace, I fight with His word, and when I am on His mission, fear is gone, and I can only love and reach out in Jesus’ name.

Before being anointed in an outing, I am fully human, and fully fighting for fear to leave and love to replace it.

Jim has been a rock for me here on earth – Jesus with skin on, if you will. He has the ability to ground me in an instant…not in the grounding like punishment, but in the grounding like mental peace.

My love languages are words…
Words of affirmation
Quality time

His are not.
Therefore, why would I think that he would be called to speak? Or write? Or do anything with words?
Now, to be honest, his current job has seen him grow in word usage tremendously, and his favorite game is words with friends.

His main language is acts of service…and he has an amazingly generous heart! Two very wonderful giftings!

When we were first married, he thought I was offended that he wasn’t as exuberant as I with worship. I didn’t understand, but I wasn’t offended or judging. Once we discussed it, I understood…he’s very quiet. When he lifts his hand in praise, he is moved tremendously!

I have spent much of our married life expecting a dream to come true if only…

  • If only I was more submissive
  • If only Jim was more open
  • If only I was more prayerful
  • If only Jim would learn to share(with me)
  • If only I was more reserved
  • If only Jim was more If only I were more…
  • THIS IS NOT FAIR TO EITHER OF US!

Jim’s call may very well be to be like Jesus.
He may have a more specific call.
I may have muddied the waters by putting out there the “call” I dreamed of…and for that, I am eternally sorry.

  • Our marriage has suffered because of my actions.
  • Our family has suffered because of my actions.
  • Our ministries have suffered because of me.

I’ve been learning about recognizing MY CALL for a little while…I mean a SHORT while!
The Associate pastor at church asked me to consider working with the children, because there was a great need. In the split second before I answered, I asked the Lord what to say. Here’s what He told me to say.

“Children’s ministry is where I hide out from doing my actual ministry. It’s an excuse not to work with wounded women”

Pastor Bob got it.
So did I.

Don’t project your call upon someone else!
And don’t let someone else project the need upon you as a call!

Pastor Keith said something else.
If you are not called to this church, I don’t want you here. Go where God wants you!

I’m not sure what that means about Jim and his choice for a church, but I cannot let go that I was called to this church.
That brings up another sticky situation in our marriage, doesn’t it?
But that’s something for us to work on in 2019.

You may be asking how is this a success?
I REALIZED THE SOURCE OF HUGE STRESS IN OUR MARRIAGE AND MY WALK WITH THE LORD!

Once you find the problem, you can find a solution.
Jim was very gracious in accepting my apology.
I’ve apologized for the pressures I put on our children before…and they have to walk in their healing, as all children have to walk in healing towards their human parents for being imperfect. That walk, in each of them, is taking different turns and ups and downs, but, we are so proud of our children.
No, non are in ministry.
No, non are in the super professions like doctor, lawyer, king.
All are functioning members of US society, providing for themselves, and in a couple cases, for their children.
All are ethical, moral, and can create an excellent argument from scripture, and some are even influencing social media for good in ways we’d never have expected.

And, we love them all.

So, to rehash “Be Like Jesus” I’m going to post some of the blogs.
My word for last year didn’t come gently. I started 2018 in pain.
Emotional and Physical.
On January 3, 2018, I didn’t like the phrase God was giving me, nor did I like the application thereof! My first writing as on learning the priority to love – like Jesus. It’s convicting, even a year later! I’m still not doing it so well, but I think the testimony at the beginning of this blog, as in, the end of 2018, says I’m learning something!

Midnight Musings are usually poetic, but the points that God gave me in the night, January 6, 2018, were these:

    • Glorify God in my struggles
    • Empathy
    • Do Good
    • Love
    • Joy
    • Peace

.

My first blog about my one word is also review of the Star Trek series Discovery. I discussed the pros and cons for this show, but, in light of “Be Like Jesus”, I came to this conclusion:

MY views…….
While they are encouraging and inspirational – they do not fill me with the love of Jesus that is MY healing power.

There’s much scripture about how I am trying to apply choices in my life. Because, being like Jesus IS a choice!

January 15th, I started unraveling some human aspects to what was keeping me from being like Jesus. Sin.

THIS IS OUR CHOICE! But if we remain afraid…if we continue lying…we will not know this freedom.

It includes one of my favorite songs by Keith Green:

Another huge thing I had to learn is that resting is being like Jesus! Say What? Yes. January 23, 2018, God cleared up the whole be Super Christian mentality for me, and let me know that HE knows that I need rest, and that HE even exemplified it for me, and created it for me! You also get a nice photo of my spoon collection!

How does this tell me to be like Jesus? REST
1. Recognize my limitations. I am finite. I am NOT GOD-Man!
2. Embrace the YOKE of HIS calling, not MY want to. Make sure I’m doing the Father’s will.
3. Remember that REST is a holy gift from my Father God. It honors God for me to rest.

The rest of the year, I wrote about preparation, recouperation, and recovery from Kidney Cancer in the Surgery Scuttlebutt series. It really was about how I learned how to be like Jesus going through a tremendous trial.

My praise in that time is that Jim said that I was always polite to the staff, no matter what their position, always thanking and always apologizing, no matter how many drugs I was on. I hope the two friends that came to stay with me afterwards can say the same. I was actively learning to be like Jesus!

I wrote several Bible studies, Lent Series, Itty Bitty Bible study, all of which you can search for on this blog. Each one, each insight into scripture, and scripture is how I learn to be like Jesus.

The huge thing(no, kidney cancer and surgery were not the most huge thing in my life this year) was shared in The End is Near… This is a play on my one word, but it is the testimony of how Jesus orchestrated our life change. It goes right up to the kidney surgery, which is then picked up in Surgery Scuttlebutt.

There are so many verses that can lead one to be like Jesus.
I can’t list them all.
There are many listed in the above blogs.
This year, I’m starting out doing Itty Bitty Bible Study in Titus – and the first few verses are about the qualities that should be evident in those that lead.

Titus 1:6-9 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
6 one who is blameless,
the husband of one wife,
having faithful children not accused of wildness or rebellion.
7 For an overseer, as God’s administrator,
must be blameless,
not arrogant,
not hot-tempered,
not addicted to wine,
not a bully,
not greedy for money,
8 but hospitable,
loving what is good,
sensible,
righteous,
holy,
self-controlled,
9 holding to the faithful message as taught,
so that he will be able both to encourage with sound teaching
and to refute those who contradict it.

That is a huge order.
But with God, nothing is impossible.
The fruit of the Spirit are evident in that list.
And, while I am not the husband of one wife…I can be committed to my one husband, and non of the others can be argued against, can they?

I guess, even though the phrase has changed….the concept is still the same!

Proverbs 4:23 English Standard Version (ESV)
23 Keep your heart with all vigilance,
for from it flow the springs of life.

Jesus kept his heart with all diligence, and we can agree that out of His heart flows springs of life.

Happy New year!

Hi!
My hope in the midst of despair and my joy in the face of depression is because of my relationship with Jesus Christ. If you do not have one, or are not sure you will join him in heaven, please check out these links.

Thanks for joining me in this journey,
In His hands and under His wings,

~Christi
Ps 63:7 Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings.

“The Lord does not give me rules, but He makes His standard very clear.
If my relationship to Him is that of love, I will do what He says without hesitation.
If I hesitate, it is because I love someone I have placed in competition with Him, namely, myself.” –
from My Utmost for His highest

Copyrights and Legal-eze
There are many organizations that support children and families. Here are ones that we are blessed to be a part of. Please consider sponsoring a child – the life you change could be your own.

Itty Bitty Bible Study – Ephesians 2:1-10 The situation

My thoughts for the Itty Bitty Bible Study group on Facebook. (join if you’d like to get these in fb!)

For review – here are the chapter 1 sections:

In the IBBS Ephesians Introduction, I shared my thoughts on Ephesians 1:1-2.
And here are the others up to this point:
IBBS Ephesians 1:3-6
IBBS Ephesians 1:7-14
IBBS Ephesians 1:7-14

Ephesians 2

Ephesians 1 is all about God’s love for us. At least, that is what Ephesians 1 speaks to me.
Ephesians 2 speaks to me of Grace. First, though, we need to see WHY we need Grace!

Ephesians 2 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
2:1 And you were dead in your trespasses and sins
2 in which you previously walked according to the ways of this world, according to the ruler who exercises authority over the lower heavens, the spirit now working in the disobedient.

  • Dead
  • trespasses
  • sins
  • ways of the world
  • according to…well, the devil

Who did we begin as dead in our sins??? In order to understand the greatness of God’s grace, we have to understand the WHY about the need.

We have to begin at the beginning, which is Genesis.
I wrote about this in Advent #6

For good measure, let’s start with Genesis chapter 2

  • God created a garden and it was good
  • God created man and he was good, except that it was not good that he was alone…
  • so God created woman, and she was good.
  • God created tress in the garden, and they were good…because the garden was good, creation was good, etc., etc.

There were two special trees…knowledge of good and evil, and the tree of life.
One they were not to eat of…the knowledge of good and evil, because in that day they would die. Only ONE rule.

Genesis 2:10-17
16 And the Lord God commanded the man, “You are free to eat from any tree of the garden, 17 but you must not eat[g] from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, for on the day you eat from it, you will certainly die.”

They knew no shame or guilt:

25 Both the man and his wife were naked, yet felt no shame.

Then came the enemy:
Genesis Chapter 3

There was ONLY one rule, ONLY one requirement, and everything else was paradise. Yet, their flesh got in the way!
Ephesians tells us that this applies to us as well.

Ephesians 2:3 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
3 We too all previously lived among them in our fleshly desires, carrying out the inclinations of our flesh and thoughts, and we were by nature children under wrath as the others were also.

So does the rest of the Bible. The bible agrees with itself.

Romans 3:23 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
23 For all have sinned and fall short of the[a] glory of God.

Isaiah 64:6 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
6 All of us have become like something unclean,
and all our righteous acts are like a polluted[a] garment;
all of us wither like a leaf,
and our iniquities carry us away like the wind.

Genesis is the Old Testament. In the New Testament in Romans 5, we have at the example of how this applies to us today. read verse 1-11 for hope, then, here’s how God planned it.

Romans 5:12 through one man came sin through one man came salvation

Romans 5:12 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
12 Therefore, just as sin entered the world through one man, and death through sin, in this way death spread to all men, because all sinned.

This is the problem – this is how genesis 3 applies to us!

Romans 5:14 through one man death reigned and through the other we have life
Adam was the protype of Christ

Romans 5:14 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
14 Nevertheless, death reigned from Adam to Moses, even over those who did not sin in the likeness of Adam’s transgression. He is a prototype[a] of the Coming One.

Romans 5:15 in the transgression of the one, many died but the free gift from the One is Grace to many
Romans 5:16 out of the transgression of one came condemnation and judgement, but because of the transgression of many, through Christ and his obedience we have the resulting justification – the gift.
Romans 5:17 from the transgression of one, death reigned. From the gift of Grace of One, Jesus Christ, we reign in life
Romans 5:18 through transgression of one came condemnation for many, but through the righteousness of the One came justification for everyone.
Romans 5:19 through Disobedience of one many were made sinners but through the obedience of the ONE many were made righteous

There will be an account made, and paid.

2 Corinthians 5:10 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
10 For we must all appear before the tribunal of Christ, so that each may be repaid for what he has done in the body, whether good or worthless.

Romans 3:4-5 let God be true and every man a liar. God has a right to pronounce judgement!

The Gift of God

Ephesians 2:4-10

Ephesians 2:4-5 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
4 But God, who is rich in mercy, because of His great love that He had for us,[a] 5 made us alive with the Messiah even though we were dead in trespasses. You are saved by grace!

Ephesians 2:8-10 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
8 For you are saved by grace through faith, and this is not from yourselves; it is God’s gift—
9 not from works, so that no one can boast.
10 For we are His creation, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared ahead of time so that we should walk in them.

The judgement is real.
The effect is real.
The gift is real.
Simply put, there are “buts” to this situation!

Romans 5:8 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
8 But God proves His own love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us!

Romans 6:23 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
23 For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Romans 8:13 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
13 for if you live according to the flesh, you are going to die. But if by the Spirit you put to death the deeds of the body, you will live.

How do we obtain this gift of God?

Some thoughts on choice from Lent day eight
Thoughts on Repentance from Jonah chapter 3
and, here’s one of my confessions as an example!

Now, I want to worship!
Grace by the Martins
Grace that is Greater than all our sins by Don Moen
Your grace still amazes me Phillip, Craig and Dean
and my favorite:

Ephesians 2:11-22 will touch on our two natures, and why we cannot do it, and why the gift of god is infinite in it’s worth

Josh Groban sings this…and many faith’s have put their own spin on this, but for me…this is my song of thanks to God, through Jesus Christ…because without Him, I am nothing!

Hi!
My hope in the midst of despair and my joy in the face of depression is because of my relationship with Jesus Christ. If you do not have one, or are not sure you will join him in heaven, please check out these links.

Thanks for joining me in this journey,
In His hands and under His wings,

~Christi
Ps 63:7 Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings.

“The Lord does not give me rules, but He makes His standard very clear.
If my relationship to Him is that of love, I will do what He says without hesitation.
If I hesitate, it is because I love someone I have placed in competition with Him, namely, myself.” –
from My Utmost for His highest

Copyrights and Legal-eze
There are many organizations that support children and families. Here are ones that we are blessed to be a part of. Please consider sponsoring a child – the life you change could be your own.

Itty Bitty Bible Study – Nahum 1:2- 15

Nahum

My thoughts for the Itty Bitty Bible Study group on Facebook. (join if you’d like to get these in fb!) The conversation starts Monday, August 20.

Nahum 1 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
Nahum 1:2
The Lord is a jealous and avenging God;
the Lord takes vengeance
and is fierce in wrath.
The Lord takes vengeance against His foes;
He is furious with His enemies.

I talked in IBBS Nahum 1:2 about God being a Jealous God.
I talked about God being an Avenging God in IBBS Nahum 2b.

Now, I will attempt to understand how the rest of Nahum applies to us in 2018.

Nahum 1 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
1 The oracle concerning Nineveh. The book of the vision of Nahum the Elkoshite.

2 The Lord is a jealous and avenging God;
the Lord takes vengeance
and is fierce in wrath.
The Lord takes vengeance against His foes;
He is furious with His enemies.

This explains with whom God is angry, and to whom he focuses his wrath!

Deuteronomy 7:10 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
10 But He directly pays back[a] and destroys those who hate Him. He will not hesitate to directly pay back[b] the one who hates Him.

Yet the following gives us a picture of God on the believer’s behalf, and the reason that we want to be RIGHT WITH GOD:

Nahum 1:3
3 The Lord is slow to anger but great in power;

IT IS FOLLOWED BY A WARNING!:

the Lord will never leave the guilty unpunished.

Nahum seems to be quoting:

Numbers 14:18 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
18 The Lord is slow to anger and rich in faithful love, forgiving wrongdoing and rebellion. But He will not leave the guilty unpunished, bringing the consequences of the fathers’ wrongdoing on the children to the third and fourth generation.

THIS IS GOD!

  • slow to anger
  • rich in faithful love
  • forgiving wrong doing and rebellion

THIS IS ALSO GOD!

  • will not leave guilty unpunished
  • bring consequences….of the fathers sins on the children…to the third and fourth generation.

Deuteronomy 5:9 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
9 You must not bow down to them or worship them, because I, the Lord your God, am a jealous God, punishing the children for the fathers’ sin to the third and fourth generations of those who hate Me,

There is a requirement for God’s blessing….

John 3:36 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
36 The one who believes in the Son has eternal life,
but the one who refuses to believe in the Son will not see life; instead, the wrath of God remains on him.

It’s all about our choice! Which side do we want to find ourselves on? Back in Nahum 1:2b, we talked about the Lord takes vengeance against his foes…furious with his enemies. I don’t want to be found to be an enemy of God!

Romans 8:7 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
7 For the mind-set of the flesh is hostile to God because it does not submit itself to God’s law, for it is unable to do so.

To be more clear:

Romans 8:7 King James Version (KJV)
7 Because the carnal mind is enmity against God: for it is not subject to the law of God, neither indeed can be.

The carnal mind, the flesh serving and focused mind is an enemy to God – but only because it CANNOT turn to God…which is WHY we need to become new creatures!

2 Corinthians 5:17 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
17 Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away, and look, new things[a] have come.

God made a way so that we could choose NOT to be his enemy!

Our God is an AWESOME God…and we need to know both sides of him! We need to understand WHY there is a requirement to believe, to obey, to honor, to worship….why we need a relationship with God through Jesus Christ!

Romans 6:23 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
23 For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.

That says it in a nutshell…it’s the plan of salvation, but more importantly, the NEED for salvation.

Nahum 1:3-5 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
3…His path is in the whirlwind and storm,
and clouds are the dust beneath His feet.
4 He rebukes the sea so that it dries up,
and He makes all the rivers run dry.
Bashan and Carmel wither;
even the flower of Lebanon withers.
5 The mountains quake before Him,
and the hills melt;
the earth trembles at His presence—
the world and all who live in it.

Worship break!
Our God is an Awesome God!

many forget this part of this song!

Once we see part of the awesomeness of God…
Then, the warning!!!

Nahum 1:6 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
6 Who can withstand His indignation?
Who can endure His burning anger?
His wrath is poured out like fire,
even rocks are shattered before Him.

As I said above, we do NOT want to be his enemies…and I’m trying to make it clear how we can become his enemies, and how can be part of his family!

Psalm 2:12 King James Version (KJV)
12 Kiss the Son, lest he be angry, and ye perish from the way, when his wrath is kindled but a little. Blessed are all they that put their trust in him.

Nehemiah 9:16-17 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
16 But our ancestors acted arrogantly;
they became stiff-necked and did not listen to Your commands.
17 They refused to listen
and did not remember Your wonders
You performed among them.
They became stiff-necked and appointed a leader
to return to their slavery in Egypt.[a]
But You are a forgiving God,
gracious and compassionate,
slow to anger and rich in faithful love,
and You did not abandon them.

Even in the midst of His people being rebellious, He still offers forgiveness…for repentance!

2 Chronicles 7:14 speaks to people that are CALLED BY HIS NAME! on the Bible hub link, you can read it in ANY version you would like!

I prefer Amplified:

2 Chronicles 7:14 Amplified Bible (AMP)
14 and My people, who are called by My Name, humble themselves, and pray and seek (crave, require as a necessity) My face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear [them] from heaven, and forgive their sin and heal their land.

Amplified Bible (AMP)
Copyright © 2015 by The Lockman Foundation, La Habra, CA 90631. All rights reserved.

THIS IS WRITTEN TO GOD’S PEOPLE…NOT THE UNBELIEVERS!!!!
This is OUR responsibility! Not just to ourselves, but to our communities, our families, our churches, our states, our nations and our world! We are the change that God places in this world!

Back to Nahum.
Even in the midst of describing the destruction of Nineveh, it’s as if God doesn’t want us overwhelmed by His vengeance, He wants us to remember the other side of Him! The side that HIS children enjoy!

Nahum 1:7 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
7 The Lord is good,
a stronghold in a day of distress;
He cares for those who take refuge in Him.

We can look at Psalm 91 – and remember specifically verses 1-2

Psalm 91:1-2 King James Version (KJV)
91 He that dwelleth in the secret place of the most High shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty.
2 I will say of the Lord, He is my refuge and my fortress: my God; in him will I trust.

We can read Psalm 46 starting with verse 1!

Psalm 46:1-2 King James Version (KJV)
46 God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble.
2 Therefore will not we fear, though the earth be removed, and though the mountains be carried into the midst of the sea;

Back to Nahum:

Nahum 1:8-10 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
8 But He will completely destroy Nineveh[d]
with an overwhelming flood,
and He will chase His enemies into darkness.
9 Whatever you plot against the Lord,
He will bring it to complete destruction;
oppression will not rise up a second time.
10 For they will be consumed
like entangled thorns,
like the drink of a drunkard
and like straw that is fully dry.

God is in control…We who believe KNOW this.
Some judgments we see here on earth…some, at a future time.

Romans 2:5 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
5 But because of your hardness and unrepentant heart you are storing up wrath for yourself in the day of wrath, when God’s righteous judgment is revealed.

KJV says “hardness and impenitent hearts”
one says “unwillingness to change.”
many others say “stubbornness.”
This concerns me because of THIS verse:

1 Samuel 15:23 King James Version (KJV)
23 For rebellion is as the sin of witchcraft, and stubbornness is as iniquity and idolatry. Because thou hast rejected the word of the Lord, he hath also rejected thee from being king.

Bible Hub gives you other versions in which to read 1 Samuel 15:23 – but the warning is still very similar!

  • Hard hearts
  • Stubborn hearts
  • impenitent hearts
  • rebellious hearts

IT’S A HEART ISSUE!

Let’s compare Egypt, Nahum’s prophecy of deliverance for Judah, and Salvation:

Enslaved

  • Exodus – enslaved to Pharoah
  • Nahum – enslaved to Sennecharib and Assyria
  • Salvation – enslaved to Sin

Cruelty

  • Exodus – forced to work in labor camps
  • Nahum – Sennecharib was hated for his cruelty, even by his allies
  • Salvation – we are cruelly kept from peace, hope, and joy, used for his purposes

In Darkness

  • Exodus – the plague of darkness descended, but they were in darkness of hopelessness
  • Nahum – The darkness of the constant fear
  • Salvation – rescued out of the darkness Colossians 1:13

Warnings

  • Exodus – the 10 plagues
  • Nahum – Nineveh warned by Jonah(you can read about Jonah starting with IBBS Jonah Introduction)
  • Salvation – Pricks of conscience – Like Saul/Paul in Acts 9:5

Sacrifice

  • Exodus – First born of all, and the Passover lamb
  • Nahum – Sennacherib – his sons killed him(Wikipedia)
  • Salvation – God’s son, Jesus(I wrote a bit about Jesus being the Passover Lamb in Advent day 12 and the New Covenant

Slavery Broken – Shackles broken

  • Exodus – they left!
  • Nahum – Judah delivered – Nahum 1:13
  • Salvation – whom the son sets free is fee indeed! John 8:36

Worship Break!

Repentance

Light

  • Exodus – Light in the darkness during the plague of darkness
  • Nahum – the promises from the prophets
  • Salvation – called out of darkness into HIS wonderful light – 1 Peter 2:9

Separated from the Enemy

  • Exodus – splitting of the red sea – enemies destroyed
  • Nahum – Civil war caused the Assyrians to be weakened(from Wikipedia)
  • Salvation – old has passed, all things made new 2 Corinthians 5:17

Responsibility

What is my point in all of this?
The Bible is ONE story – the story about how God created us to enjoy HIS presence, we messed up, like a parent he has to discipline us, but he calls us back to HIM! and when we cannot make it, which none of us can, HE made the way!

Let’s finish up chapter one.

Nahum 1:11 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
11 One has gone out from you,[a]
who plots evil against Yahweh,
and is a wicked counselor.

Not all counselors are good ones…some are wolves in sheep’s clothing….

Nahum 1:12-13
12 This is what the Lord says:
Though they are strong[h] and numerous,
they will still be mowed down,
and he[i] will pass away.
Though I have afflicted you,[j]
I will afflict you no longer.
13 For I will now break off his yoke from you
and tear off your shackles.

The Promise of deliverance in the midst of an overwhelming enemy!

Nahum 1:14
14 The Lord has issued an order concerning you:
There will be no offspring
to carry on your name.[k]
I will eliminate the carved idol and cast image
from the house of your gods;
I will prepare your grave,
for you are contemptible.

Complete annihilation of the enemy…makes me think of Revelation!!!

Nahum 1:15 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
15 [l]Look to the mountains—
the feet of one bringing good news
and proclaiming peace!
Celebrate your festivals, Judah;
fulfill your vows.
For the wicked one will never again
march through you;
he will be entirely wiped out.

2 Chronicles 20:15 King James Version (KJV)
15 And he said, Hearken ye, all Judah, and ye inhabitants of Jerusalem, and thou king Jehoshaphat, Thus saith the Lord unto you, Be not afraid nor dismayed by reason of this great multitude; for the battle is not yours, but God’s.

Read Exodus 14:14 in all of it’s versions…the LORD will fight for US! for ME! for YOU!

Psalm 46:10 King James Version (KJV)
10 Be still, and know that I am God: I will be exalted among the heathen, I will be exalted in the earth.

No matter what a mess we have made of our lives, God can straighten it out.
No matter how big the enemy, God can take them down.
No matter how long the trial, God can see us through!

Hi!
My hope in the midst of despair and my joy in the face of depression is because of my relationship with Jesus Christ. If you do not have one, or are not sure you will join him in heaven, please check out these links.

Thanks for joining me in this journey,
In His hands and under His wings,

~Christi
Ps 63:7 Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings.

“The Lord does not give me rules, but He makes His standard very clear.
If my relationship to Him is that of love, I will do what He says without hesitation.
If I hesitate, it is because I love someone I have placed in competition with Him, namely, myself.” –
from My Utmost for His highest

Copyrights and Legal-eze
There are many organizations that support children and families. Here are ones that we are blessed to be a part of. Please consider sponsoring a child – the life you change could be your own.

Surgery Scuttlebutt – The finale

If you don’t know what scuttlebutt is, please check out

Intro, part one, part two, part three and part four

If you want a great book to help you prepare for, and recover with, please check out Healing and Hope by Christine Carter. Tell her Christi sent you!

Here is my latest video to the Wildberry Patch group on facebook…

GREAT NEWS!
The Cancer is gone
the Kidney is healing
the kidney is working like a healthy kidney!
YAY!

With that said and done…What was the journey from part six, to this one, the finale?

Well, there was the struggle with confusion with the pain and doctor’s instructions, as I share in Pain/Peace.

There is so many things that I;ve learned on this journey, and I’m still learning, because the wound site for the JP Tube is still an open wound. My skin is bleeding from the tape used to keep the bandages on it for the last, going on 6 weeks. BUT GOD!

God is our creator, and He made us in His image (just read Genesis 1 and 2), so He infused us with creativity! Once the major drainage stopped…I was waiting for an answer…and he has given me one that is giving my skin relief. Also, someone was given creativity for the super special sensitive skin tape…when I have to use tape, I use that now!

That said, I’ve also learned that I need to set boundaries…for myself and others.
What? you say? Boundaries? Christi, of what do you speak??? HAHAHA!

Yes, I have to realize that without that tube in me, I do not have the continual pull on skin that caused sheering pain, and could drive me to my knees! Now, I just get tired. And some base pain from the muscles that have been in rest mode for 6 weeks! First day…I walked out to the garden, and into the garden, to my daughters house, and then back to my herb garden.
This was after I straightened up my own office… yep…putting things away, bending and reaching.

OW! Boundaries…who knew?

I’m going to finish up this series by sharing what I’ve learned, by going through the final chapters in this book. Christine Carter has really been a Godsend to help me take this journey step by step!

Chapter 8Own it, Laugh a Little and Get Out.

“Here’s the thing: you are physically broken right now.
You might not have showered for days, and the stench you exude proves it”

Personally, I lived with baby wipes and those neat cloths that hospital gave me to bathe with.
I did wear deodorant.
My hair was always up…because if it was down, folks would know just how dirty it was!

Showering was a torment…and the last shower before the tube came out seemed to almost pull the stitch that held the tube in out of the skin. I mean, seriously…who thought ONE stitch would keep this tube connected to me…ME, the one that hates to sit still so God has allowed some physical ailments to MAKE me sit still. I was afraid that I’d torn something inside…I was afraid I’d caused infection…I was afraid. Period.

This chapter helped me to NOT compare myself to other able bodied people, or even others going through physical trials. I needed to OWN IT…this was the current NORMAL for me…and the only way to get through this valley was to MOVE through it! Not exercise type moving…but, mentally moving.

GO OUT – yes, I chose some opportunities to go out.
With my husband for our anniversary

With a friend to Olive Garden, and a few others places.
Do you know what I struggled with?
The stupid JP Tube showing as a bump under my clothes…no matter how bulky the clothing was.
I didn’t want anyone to look at me and wonder “what’s that under her shirt/dress?”

“You need to be okay with where you’re at right now”

I wasn’t…and I was vain!
God spoke to my heart…how do you respond to someone you see with a catheter? Oxygen? any other health related addition?
“Lord, I would look at them, not the appliance…let them know they are human, and I see them!”

Then humble yourself to learn how they truly feel, and be thankful for such tools for your healing.

This all happened in a matter of seconds, between getting out of the car, and stepping up on the curb.
Just to really drive it home…when the tube was removed, Jim was going to take me out for dinner. As I got out of the car, I started walking into the restaurant, and noticed that the side of my dress where the tube was had gotten soaked with bodily fluid. The little bandage the doctor had put on was in no way ready for the flow…and my dress caught the rest.

“oh no, let’s just go home!”
Ever supportive, Jim started to turn around, and he said Ok…but I remembered this earlier lesson….
“No – I’ll go into the bathroom and see what I can do…and it’s not so big I can’t cover it with my purse. Let’s go in”

Sometimes, when we are given lessons, we get a retest later, to see if we were really listening!

I’m thankful for the mornings I’ve spent on my swing.

And, I’ve found that if I smile at someone…they don’t notice the JP tube sticking out of my shirt, the wet stain on the side of my dress, or the wheelchair that I’m in. They smile back.

I also planned from the beginning to enjoy two FB shows…
Returning the Favor with Mike Rowe
Drybar comedy show

These have helped me laugh, and rejoice in others outside of myself.

Chapter 9Prayer and Spirituality

“Religion/spirituality is a significant part of many people’s lives. This is one area that should not be neglected, especially now. …
For me, Christ is the only answer and true source of peace”

Christine allows that there are other faiths that one may be a part of, and encourages all to seek their faith in times such as these, but clearly speaks to her faith as a Christian.

This may be the first time God has had you all to Himself

Not quite true…but, often true that I’m too busy to just be still.
This has been a learning about being still…knowing that HE is God…
declaring that HE is God
acknowledging that I AM NOT God!

Here are a few of my lessons learned:

  • My worth is based on WHOSE I am, not who I am
  • asking for help is part of life
  • Saying No can be healthy
  • Speak LIFE -scriptures – over my life, body, husband, children, friends…SPEAK LIFE not death
  • My messenger group of prayer partners…I would get an encouragement every day!

And a huge change in my view point:
Let It Go…Let them go!
Some people are in my life for a time
others for eternity.
let those that want to leave, leave.
If I have tried to make sure I didn’t offend, and gotten a response that I did not, then…
It’s not personal, so don’t take it personal.

Seriously – I’ve spend so much wasted time worrying over folks that I thought I had a connection with that just dropped me like a hot potato.
Some that I thought would be prayer partners with me that didn’t even want to receive notifications of the surgery(and they had asked for them).
Some I thought were my best friends, that decided that a hurt, misunderstanding or whatever was far more important than restoring our friendship.

If I have done what I could do…I cannot change their minds.   Here’s the Bible on my responsibility:

Matthew 5:23-24 Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
23 So if you are offering your gift on the altar, and there you remember that your brother has something against you, 24 leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled with your brother, and then come and offer your gift.

There are more scriptures.
I cannot force anyone to forgive me, I can only apologize, and try to make amends.
If I don’t know what I’ve done, I can’t fix it…and in that case, again, I need to let it go, I need to let them go.

Christine has a great outline for prayer in this chapter, with fill in spaces for one to write them in.

Chapter 10 A new Day

“Wherever you are on this healing journey, I want to promise you something:
There will be a day when you are done healing.”

I’m not there yet…but, I’m closer than I was 6 weeks ago!

“you will treasure what you discovered during the long, quiet moments of reflection, dreaming and digging deep to find passion, purpose, and new ideas for the road ahead.”

That is what these surgery scuttlebutt stories are all about.
I have restored my faith in Jesus Christ.
I have remembered my calling to write a book.
I have received the love of many, virtual and physical as I’ve healed.
and I rejoice in the way the Lord has met me on each step!

“Some things need to be broken, opened and taken apart to let light in.
Look for the light, my friend. It is shining somewhere in you.”

Amen!

Chapter 11
And another thing

“After you are all healed and life has returned to its rapid pace, you may still have those lovely little reminders of this difficult season:
that twinge of pain comes along now and again, or maybe your arm doesn’t quite boast the strength it once did….”

I have a 12 inch scar now….and no idea how the JP tube hole will heal.
I have a kidney that I need to treat carefully…I need to seriously consider my diet options.
I have muscles that are achy…and, there are a whole set of side muscles that have been cut that will not like doing side bends, or anything else!

This is my new normal.
And, I thank God for it.
If I had not gone through all the stuff to get to Cleveland Clinic….The End is Near explains the journey…I would not even have this kidney!

I’ve learned to rejoice in hearing the birds.
I’ve learned to laugh with my grandchildren, and my husband, and my friends.
I’ve learned that I can love others from my bed because I live in the age of social media!
I’ve learned that others love me.
And even more so, I’ve learned again, that Jesus loves me!

 
Hi!
My hope in the midst of despair and my joy in the face of depression is because of my relationship with Jesus Christ. If you do not have one, or are not sure you will join him in heaven, please check out these links.

Thanks for joining me in this journey,
In His hands and under His wings,

~Christi
Ps 63:7 Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings.

“The Lord does not give me rules, but He makes His standard very clear.
If my relationship to Him is that of love, I will do what He says without hesitation.
If I hesitate, it is because I love someone I have placed in competition with Him, namely, myself.” –
from My Utmost for His highest

Copyrights and Legal-eze
There are many organizations that support children and families. Here are ones that we are blessed to be a part of. Please consider sponsoring a child – the life you change could be your own.

Pain/Peace

Pain
Sharp
Knife
Breathtaking
Sight blurring
Pain

Doctor?
Support?
Guidance?
Brush off
Exhausting
Pain

Why can’t they just give me information so that I can make an informed decision?

Pain
Wait
Concern
Knowledge
Not bad enough
Brush off

Pain
ER
No help
No information
No confirmation
Just “go”

I know there is no infection from the basic Natural Signs.
But I don’t know what doctors know and can’t make up my mind.

Pain
Normal
Don’t move
Be still
Just lay around
And wait

Two
Weeks
Past
Schedule
Need removal
Need compassion

Pain?
ER!
Won’t touch me!
Cyob doc
Why call him?
No help.

But if there is a deep infection for which this pain does tell,
it’s me that is going to suffer and go through the physical hell.

Pain
Common
Breakthrough
Ignored
The answer?
Wait.

Pain
No pain
Health
No health
Ask for help
Brushed away

But God has promised to give me wisdom if I ask of him.
God gives me Godly counselors and I can ask of them.

Pain
Love
Tiring
Energizing
Counselors
Encouragement

Joy
Peace
Decision
Confirmation
Unwavering
Love

God gives me counselors to comfort and to guide.
God gives me soul mates to settle my insides.

Peace
Quiet
Be still
And know
That I am
God.

This poem was written one day when I was confused and struggling after my surgery, and waiting for the last step of my post op. This was written during my time, in which I prepared for  the finale.
The story of my weeks of surgery and recovery is shared in Surgery Scuttlebutt.

 
Hi!
My hope in the midst of despair and my joy in the face of depression is because of my relationship with Jesus Christ. If you do not have one, or are not sure you will join him in heaven, please check out these links.

Thanks for joining me in this journey,
In His hands and under His wings,

~Christi
Ps 63:7 Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings.

“The Lord does not give me rules, but He makes His standard very clear.
If my relationship to Him is that of love, I will do what He says without hesitation.
If I hesitate, it is because I love someone I have placed in competition with Him, namely, myself.” –
from My Utmost for His highest

Copyrights and Legal-eze
There are many organizations that support children and families. Here are ones that we are blessed to be a part of. Please consider sponsoring a child – the life you change could be your own.